A Story about the Destruction
of Rural Idaho Neighborhoods
Once Upon a Time
There was a very rich doctor who had a very spoiled little Princess. He bought her 10 acres of land in an area that was zoned Rural Agriculture. He secretly told her to build whatever she wanted and to ask permission when it was all built. He told all of the neighbors they were just going to “Grow Grapes”. Everyone was happy.
Grapes in Eagle? The Joke!
But grapes have never been commercially grown in Eagle. Why? Because the temperature is not conducive like it is in the Nampa Sunny Slope area by the Snake River. A very well known Vintner and Bee Keeper once commented that it was a big joke that people in Eagle were capitalizing on the popularity of the location to turn it into a “Wine Region”. But when you have enough money flooding into an area, you can buy whatever you want, American Viticultural Area designation and all! And the Vintner/Beekeeper is laughing all the way to the bank as they are having to buy grapes from him to drive to their fancy Eagle locations to make their wines because grapes really don’t grow in Eagle nor in enough quantity to sustain their own “Estate Vineyards”. The grape vines are for decoration.
Then she built a Commercial Building
Then she had a Commercial Contractor build a 2000 sq. ft. home (600 sq. ft. 1 bedroom, 1 bathroom home with a 2,000 sq foot basement) in the high rent district of Eagle where most homes are small mansions. She got the plans approved by the County Commissioners somehow. The area was never zoned for Commercial Buildings, but her dad told her it was OK! Just get it built and then ask for forgiveness. After all, she had her real home with more than one bedroom and bathroom that she could really live there with her kids and husband (The toad in this story. Maybe he’ll turn into a prince but doubt it. His mom had to comfort him at the County Hearings. Poor baby!) So, she planted a whole 3 acres of grapes on a 10-acre lot. Good thing she knew the Vintner/Beekeeper so she could buy his grapes!
Then she had to come clean
When the signs went up for County Approval, everyone saw the truth in what she was doing. She was going to start hosting large events and build another 8,000 sq. ft. structure to manufacture more Bubbly! She was building a commercial winery in what was absolutely not zoned as such according to the County’s original plans. She didn’t even live there which she needed to according to code. The County didn’t mind because they had dollar signs in their eyes and Agritourists to entertain! No one wanted to listen to the locals who just wanted to live in a nice quiet neighborhood. Everyone was ok if she wanted to grow grapes. But the little Princess had grand plans! And rich Daddy was happy to help funnel money to her.
Rich Daddy even had to shell out surprise funds so people could get to her humble “home” to taste her wine. She was using the fancy street name that was created for the neighborhood, but it was a private road, and she couldn’t have patrons driving up it to buy Bubbly! So, she had to build a fancy dirt road that winds through the estate to get to her home. Now she has to use a rather ugly sounding name and the entry is rather unsightly. But her whole home is rather unsightly with large solar panels and farm equipment scattered around the building. It certainly doesn’t look like the kind of place that would attract those wanting to buy $40 a bottle Bubbly. Would you drive your fancy car up a long gravel driveway? But who needs business knowledge or a plan when you have a Rich Daddy!
Neighborhood Approval
And the final straw was when she sent out the votes for approval to sell alcohol from her “home”. She needed 75% neighbor approval. She fell vastly short. But the nice County Commissioners that are excited to promote Agritourism and drive their fancy cars up her fancy dirt driveway gave her the approval she needed. She never needed to worry about anything that was in place to protect the neighbors, the neighborhood or any planning the County had done. In fact, this approval improved the property value significantly! When she gets tired of trying to get people to drive up her fancy dirt driveway to buy overpriced bubbly, she may have to sell her business. If that happens, because you could not realistically live there (think big warehouse), she has opened the door with a fabulous permit that will be sold with the property for a more successful winery to buy it and have a complete party pass to sell wine every weekend! Rich Daddy will be able to get his money back! In what originally was a rural residential area, they went in without the zoning or a business plan, lied to all of the neighbors about what they were doing and created a turnkey commercial wine operation and Little Princess got her wish. Rich Daddy and her Fairy Godmothers and Godfathers at the County Commissioner’s Office gave her money, forgiveness and the approval to do whatever she wanted! Hopefully karma will take care of all of this in the long run. One can only wish! Because wishes and dreams can come true just like they did for the Little Princess!
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The moral of this story is that it is a joke to grow grapes in Eagle, ID, The County Commissioners don’t care about protecting residential areas and Agritourism is the guise for hiding converting rural residential areas into business opportunities for new people moving to Idaho. And if all else fails, just do it and ask for forgiveness! It worked for the Little Princess!
What can you do?
Don’t vist these places
Boycott the “Estate Vineyards”. As a resident, please imagine how you’d feel if your neighbor was hosting large parties for the general paying public. How would you feel? Please go to the public areas that are zoned and prepared for parking and events. Please respect our neighborhood like you would your neighborhood.